Clever Comebacks & Retorts From Internet Geniuses

It’s a tale as old as time. After a long day of staring at your screen in anger,  you’re standing (or maybe sitting, crying) in the shower. Just trying to wash away the agony of the day. As you lather up your hair with sweet-smelling shampoo, there it is. A “Eureka!” moment. No, not the meaning of life. But the perfect zinger that would have absolutely destroyed that annoying bully in the office cafeteria, or perhaps that obnoxious Twitter troll you wanted to clobber with words. It’s unfortunate that timing is so crucial when it comes to comebacks, and yet we have so damn little of it. While we can’t really march up to the crappy coworker and give them a piece of our mind, the internet is (thankfully) a little more forgiving where timing is concerned. From the safety of our cubicle, it’s rather easy to think of some brutal ammo to use against one’s internet enemies. Thanks to the r/CleverComebacks community, we’ve got some examples of clever people who definitely used that extra time to their advantage. Fetch the burn cream!