The Funniest Parenting Tweets of the Week (March 9, 2023)

The golden age of parents on Twitter lying about the esoteric things their young children say has long passed us. Back in the ancient years of 2016 and 2017, parents were obsessed with tweeting things like, “My 3-year-old son came just up to me and said ‘Papa, I have a childlike solution to great economic and social problems that will go viral instantly through the retweets of easily fooled rubes.'” Unfortunately for these parents, a lot of Twitter users have caught on to these unbelievably corny lies and have been roasting them ever since.

These days, parents don’t need to tweet fake things that make their children sound smart or deep. Kids are natural comedians without even needing to be edited by their parents. Nobody wants to hear the monologuing of a fake profound child; that’s what 90s comedies are for. The following parenting tweets contain authentic musings of children, as well as funny observations about parenting as a profession.