Are You a Sidewalk Hazard? Inside the Hilarious Grading of NYC Pedestrians

Walking seems like one of those skills we locked down in toddlerhood. Put one foot in front of the other, avoid tipping over, repeat. But if you have ever tried navigating a crowded city sidewalk during lunch hour, you know that walking is actually a high-stakes contact sport requiring situational awareness, spatial geometry, and reasonable speed.

Enter content creator Cameron Roh, who took to the streets of New York City to do what frustrated commuters have always wanted to do: hand out literal report cards to pedestrians based on their sidewalk driving skills.

The Pedestrian Driver's Ed Test

Roh evaluated passersby on a scale from 1 to 10 based on three core criteria: walking speed, positioning on the pavement, and general navigation etiquette. It turns out that walking down a city block without causing a five-person pileup is harder than it looks.

One of the biggest point deductions went to people who drifted down the walkway at a snail's pace, lost in thought or mesmerized by skyscrapers. Wandering aimlessly in the middle of a busy sidewalk is the pedestrian equivalent of driving 15 mph in the fast lane with your left blinker on. You might be having a lovely afternoon, but the three people trapped behind you are silently drafting a sternly worded essay.

Beware the Dreaded 'Triple-Wide'

To make grading easy to understand, Roh coined some specific terms for sidewalk formations. Walking next to a friend makes you a "double-wide," while three abreast creates the formidable "triple-wide."

Now, walking in a group of three isn't inherently evil—people just want to chat with their friends! But taking up the entire span of the pavement without giving an inch to oncoming foot traffic is a guaranteed way to fail the test. In Roh's evaluations, a group of three walking side-by-side without yielding earned an immediate score of zero out of 10.

On the flip side, there is a clear path to extra credit. If you are walking in a pair and temporarily shift into single file to let someone pass, you are a hero of civil society. That simple move alone bumped pedestrian scores up to a stellar 8 out of 10.

Keep to the Right

The fundamental rule of sidewalk survival boils down to basic road etiquette: stick to the right. Drifting diagonally across oncoming traffic or stopping abruptly in the center lane to check a text message will quickly tank your score.

The Otterly Interesting Part

Believe it or not, pedestrian traffic actually follows the laws of fluid dynamics. Physicists who study crowd control have found that without any signs or police officers, humans naturally form directional lanes on busy walkways once a certain density is reached. We subconsciously self-organize to keep the collective flow moving—which is why it feels so jarring when someone breaks the pattern by walking backwards while eating a pretzel.

The Final Verdict

Next time you step out onto a bustling street, take a quick audit of your walking style. Are you smoothly merging, keeping to the right, and dropping into single file when space gets tight? Or are you part of a zero-point triple-wide blockade? The sidewalk is your highway—walk responsibly!

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